HOW NOT TO CHEAPEN YOUR BRAND

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YOU may have noticed another royal baby has happened. You may also have noticed a flurry of PR activity as some brands desperately try to hitch their wagons to the new lad’s Christening gown. That may be a laboured metaphor, but it’s nowhere near as tortuous as some of the attempts to use this baby as a nascent brand ambassador.

This is all before he’s even been named. That’s when the “free bottle of Dave’s Barbecue Sauce for anyone who can prove their name is Leroy [or whatever it turns out to be] Windsor” offers start flooding the inboxes of people who neglected to tick the “leave me alone” box. This may actually be the last chance for some companies to use databases that are soon to be rendered illegal next month when the General Data Protection Regulation becomes enforceable.

If you don’t want to cheapen your brand, don’t give away a year’s supply of baby wipes for all babies born on St George’s Day. Don’t announce a flash sale of stretch mark cream to celebrate the birth. And don’t arrange a photo shoot outside the Lindo Wing of St Mary’s Hospital to pimp out Union Jack-themed summer jumpsuits.

This poor kid is going to have every part of his life scrutinised forensically for the rest of his days. Try not to add to the already overwhelming volume of inane chatter. It won’t do you or your brand any favours.

Pete Bell